Baby You Can Drive My Car
by Mary James
Summary: Nixon and Tab have too much to drink, and some car problems. Nixon/Talbert


**Author's Note/Disclaimer  
**I really have no idea where this came from. The title is stolen shamelessly from the Beatle's song of the same title. Nixon/Tab, with a big, nice R rating. Also, no harm is meant towards the real men, this is completely fictitious and based off the miniseries. Enjoy!

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_Baby You Can Drive My Car_

They shouldn't be driving. Well, Nixon muses, Floyd Talbert shouldn't be driving, he is the one behind the wheel after all. But really, he is a better candidate for driving right now than Lewis Nixon.  
They're drunk. Off balance, tilting steps, giggly, piss ass drunk. Dick would kill them. Well, Dick would kill Nix. Everything seems to be his fault. What did Harry tell him Doc Roe had shouted at he and Dick? He's an officer, he ought to know better. A grown up. That's what Dick would say.

Floyd barely looks grown up himself, sitting next to Nix and driving haphazardly through the darkened forests. Moonlight filters eerily through the tall pines that seem to climb up infinitely around them. The air is cool, but Nixon can see Tab's cheeks flushed pink from drinking. He wants to reach out, feel how warm he is.

Tab has been humming something under his breath, because Nixon notices when he stops. Abruptly, a look of puzzlement crosses his face, and then he brings the jeep to a halt so suddenly that he nearly throws both of them out.

"Christ, Tab. I didn't make it all the way through the war to have you break all my bones in an automobile accident." Nixon rubs the back of his neck.

Tab just looks at him, drunkenly indignant. "I don't know where we are. We went the wrong way."  
Nix looks around, his head spinning a bit. The trees take unfamiliar shapes, he's not sure the road is supposed to split there. Nix swears under his breath.

Tab puts the jeep in reverse, turns the wheel to back up, and then steps on the gas with more force that would ever be necessary. Nixon swears much louder when they slam back into the tree.

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The jeep refuses to start now, and neither of them is sober enough to know what to do about it. Their minds are too hazy, fingers too clumsy. Nixon has resorted to rattling off heartfelt obscenities every time Tab fails to get the engine to turn over.

Tab tries the key one more time and then lets it drop, his hand falling heavily onto his knee. Nixon heaves a great sigh.  
"Fucking Austria."

Talbert kind of chuckles and slouches down, letting the drink get the best of him, eyes closed and arms folded over his chest. Nix pulls out his flask and takes a drink, the whiskey burning all the way down. He nudges Tab and holds out his flask, and Tab accepts. Nix watches him, his cheeks still dark, lips pressed to the metal of the flask. Nix seems a bit breathless suddenly, and when Tab hands the whiskey back, he catches him watching. Tab doesn't look away, surprisingly. His eyes are wide and dark, and Nixon wonders fleetingly if he would taste like Vat 69 right now if he kissed him.

Whether out of burning, drunken curiosity, or something else entirely, Nix doesn't wait long to find out.  
He lunges forward, pulling Talbert closer, and kisses him. His mouth is already open against Nix's, and hot, so hot. Nixon feels like they're burning up, and he can taste the whiskey inside Tab's mouth, on his tongue.  
He's pulling at Tab's hair, one hand on the back of his neck, and when Talbert groans he feels it go straight to his groin.

"Captain.."

Nix pulls back and looks at him, a grin slowly spreading across his face. "Floyd, did you just call me Captain? While I had my tongue down your throat?"

Tab starts to stutter something and goes very red, but Nix drops his head down, pressing open mouthed kisses against Tab's neck.

"I think, that considering the circumstances, you could call me Lewis if you wanted. Lew even." Nixon breathes, biting down on an earlobe probably harder than was necessary. Tab's breathing hitches and Nixon reaches down, palming the younger man's erection through his pants.

"Fuck Lew…" His name sounds better than it ever has at that moment, and Tab's eyes flutter closed.

Nixon continues to explore his jawline, feeling the stubble scrape against his lips and desperately trying to get Tab's pants to just _unzip already_. He lets out a little growl of frustration before he _finally_ gets them to unzip and he shoves his hand in without warning, causing Tab to moan loudly, bucking up against him. He grabs for Nixon's face, kissing him as they both continue to move.  
Nixon grins against his lips and slows down his stokes, increasing the pressure a little bit but drawing them out longer until Tab is practically panting into his mouth.

"Christ, Lew. I…oh God" and then he is arching up off the seat, groaning and coming into Nix's hand as he continues to work him.

He slumps down bonelessly as Nixon wipes his hand on the underneath of the seat. Tab glances over at him.

"You want me to…you know…" he gestures at Nixon, grinning a little.  
"Well Sergeant Talbert, I would certainly not be opposed to you returning the favor." Nix smiles smugly.

His mouth drops open then, when Tab sits in between the narrow space on the floor of the jeep and yanks his pants down quicker than he could have imagined a drunk man could.

God and he was so hard, and fuck if watching his cock disappear into those bruised lips wasn't the most sinful thing he had ever seen. His fingers are threading through Tab's hair, and he was trying desperately not to thrust against the feel of his mouth around him.

It doesn't take long before he's coming, gasping for air and making noises he doesn't want to admit are his. Tab sits back up next to him again when he's done, wiping at his mouth, and there's a little grin tugging at the corner of his lips. Nixon just leans back and closes his eyes, feeling sated and sleepy.

"We're still lost aren't we Tab?"  
He hears Talbert's snort of laughter and then the jingle of the keys. Tab tries the jeep one last time, and it sounds like it actually might start this time before it dies abruptly.

Nix opens his eyes and sits up, looking over at Tab before climbing out of the jeep and taking off walking without a word. He doesn't know how many miles it is back, but he figures they can catch a ride. Tab soon catches up to him, falling into step with Nixon's slightly longer stride. They're both still a little unsteady, and Tab is glancing around at the dark forest.

"You sure walking is a good idea?"  
Nix raises an eyebrow, and glances back at the crashed jeep.  
"You sure driving was a good idea Tab?"  
"Depends I guess." Tab gives him a little smirk, ducking his head, and Nixon laughs out loud, feeling the alcohol still in him.

His laughter soon gets drowned out though by the sound of an approaching vehicle, and it's headlights are suddenly blazingly bright. They both shield their eyes and stumble out of the way as the jeep pulls up next to them.

"Out for a little stroll in the moonlight boys?" Harry's voice comes out of the darkness, and Nix is grinning and blinking to adjust to the new light.

"Harry! Well thank God someone else is out in these godforsaken woods. Take us back to town?"

"Nix. Sergeant Talbert." Says a second voice. A calmer, somewhat amused one.

"Dick! You too?" Nix climbs into the jeep and offers Tab a hand up.

"Listen Dick, Sergeant Talbert and I here had a few problems with some trees back there, and lost our damn jeep to them. I figured you'd understand."

Harry is chuckling in the passenger's seat as Nix pulls out his flask, taking a drink before offering it to Tab. Dick just shakes his head, turns the jeep around, and then puts it in drive.


End file.
